29/09/2019
It’s true of everyone
That everything could be different
A thousand little choices
Led us to be
Where we are now
We could have been cowboys
My brothers and I
But a logistical problem
Stopped us moving to the country
And riding horses near Grafton
If we kept the baby
When my friend with benefits
Told me she was pregnant
Nothing would be the same
It can destroy you
If you let it
Thinking about all the things
That could have been different
If you hadn’t picked up the phone
One fateful day so long ago,
Had made a move sooner
When heaven beckoned
And had thought twice
Before the awful crunch
But you can’t change the past
Only try to do better
Each moment as it passes
Take pride in the decisions you make now
And let the path of regret
Fade to black
As you walk the through fire of modern life
—
When I started to get to know my father I found out we were supposed to move to the country when me and my brothers were kids. It fell through and we grew up in the suburbs of Canberra.
When I first got locked up I didn’t know if I was going to spend the rest of my days behind bars. Put myself though hell thinking of all the things I could have done differently or not at all.
Later in life I have forgiven myself but I still think sometimes of what could have been had I played the hands I was dealt in a thousand different ways.
I keep the words of hard core punk band ‘Champion’ with me, “There’s always a path you can take break free and take pride in decisions you’ve made”.