I want her to be happy above all else.
18/02/2021
Let’s have a moment of clarity
Let’s see what we need to see
The truth is my dear
That you are right not to love me
I’m unlovable
A you remain
A light too bright
For my soul to bear
If only you had
A kind word for me
It would heal a thousand cuts
And give life fresh meaning
But I keep my distance
Lest my demons hurt you
Who is so pure and undeserving
Of the misery that permeates
More lives than not
I only hope and prey
That I misread your sadness
That’s it’s just an aesthetic
You find appealing
And not in part the result
Of my own epic failures
I can bare the hurt
Of love lost
But knowing your sadness
Might be in some small amount
My own fault
Is too much for my troubled soul
Find joy
Find love
Find meaning
Find contentment
And please, please, please
Be happy in this world
—
I still have the woman I loved for 15 years on Instagram, she’s an artist and her work seems to be filled with melancholia. I honestly hope I’m misreading it and in truth have to avoid looking at her posts as they have a terrible effect on my usually good mood.
I want her to be happy above all else and I know deep down she’s better off without me but I wish I could cure her sadness.
High Seas Clothing 
Whenever we guess what’s going on, what’s wrong, or even right…we’re usually wrong. Don’t torture yourself over things you can’t know.
LikeLike
Thanks for the insight, best wishes:)
LikeLike
Very eloquently versed
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thank you good sir:)
LikeLike
You are as ever most deservedly welcome
LikeLike
Beautiful poem, Christo! I don’t know you personally, but it seems to me that you have a lot to offer in a relationship. Why not get in touch and give her a chance to say how she feels. You won’t know until you try. ❤
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks Cheryl, I often think about it but I feel like she’s well and truly moved on. Maybe when I’ve proved myself a decent human being I’ll check in with her.. I still carry a stigma that’s hard for some to process. Food for thought anyway, all the best take care🙂
LikeLike
It can be sad if melancholia is a main element of her life. On the positive side there are those writers whose genre is “melancholia” or “nature” or “horror” etc. Anyway, when you’re ready, just ask her straightaway if this is her general mindset. Peace, Christo.
Art
LikeLiked by 1 person
Thanks man, good insight and welcome advice, all the best brother
LikeLike