Breathe Deep, Seek Peace

Learning and fresh knowledge are essential.

18/01/2021

The tree of wisdom beckons

To all who would heed its call

The ancient power of nature

Breathing life into

Our weary souls

Let this fresh knowledge

These new synapses firing

Be a rapturous discovery

Of the healing power

Contained within

The oceans, rivers and forests

As the waves wash away

The pain and longing

And the wind in the trees

Whispers sweet nothings

To nurture peace within

Our tired thoughts

With time

We could spiral upwards

With content and meaningful

Thoughts, words, actions

Gliding

Surfing

Floating

On the beauty

Found only on planet earth

This blessed world

With all its angels and devils

Has all we need to find

Heaven within ourselves

You just need to know

Where to look

Start with the tree of wisdom

Drink deeply from the springs of knowledge

And never, ever, ever give up

Lately I’ve been looking for artwork to use as inspiration for new work. I came across this lovely drawing from an artist named Jo Fox and wrote a new poem inspired by it.

You can check out her work here:

https://jofoxadventuresinart.wordpress.com/

And the story of the piece here:

https://jofoxadventuresinart.wordpress.com/2021/01/01/natural_cycles/

I believe that learning and fresh knowledge are essential to a life well lived.

Lost At Sea

Some never make it back to dry land.

10/01/2021

Every step

Takes us further from home

And try as we might

To swim against the tide

We inevitably find ourselves

Lost at sea

Fighting to steer clear

Of the relentless sharks

Pray they don’t smell blood

And that rescue comes

God knows it happens

Rarely enough

The only thing

That can save our souls

Is to share the burden

With a fellow human

Taking the pain away

Creating meaning

And a sense of home once lost

Where all was black misery

Blessed be the lighthouse

The life raft and the light fantastic

Guiding us home

If we are so blessed

As to escape

From the ongoing horrible sea

—

Every now and then I like to maintain the occasional nautical aesthetic in my work.

We all leave the nest of home sooner or later and often find ourselves without that sense of security for months and years until we finally settle down and create a home of our own.

Some never make it back to dry land, unfulfilled bachelors until death; some lose their life to the prison walls.

I count myself among the blessed that the possibility of finding a sense of home is still alive.

Champion

Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion.

09/01/2021

Life can be Heaven

Life can be hell

A mixture of the seeds you sow

And the cards life gives you

It takes some next level

Misfortune and mismanagement

To find the sort of pain and misery

That you can only find

In the jails of the world

Even the soft jails

Are no picnic

So it takes next level

Hard work and resilience

To undo the horror

To set yourself free

From the revolving door

Of re-offending, parole breaches and drug addiction

A lengthy stretch

Say 6 years

For a necessary deed

Can make or break you

And even end your life

If you don’t stay vigilant

So if you ever find yourself thinking

‘Is this the real thing? Is this just fantasy?”

Pray you have what it takes

To get free better than you were

To never acquiesce

To the temptations that destroy

And like they all say and I’ve said before

“Suffer now and live the rest of your life like a champion”

—

Once you’ve been to jail for anything more than a few months it becomes a full time job for some just trying to stay out. The problem is partly that drug use and violence are so rife in most jails that some inmates who have never even touched drugs before get out with a habit.

When I first got locked up a psych told me that a lot of convicts actually prefer life in jail to the outside. It blew my mind but after 6 years I understand it. If I had stayed any longer I might have been the same.

It’s a common saying in jail and a lot of inmates have the poster on the wall of Muhammad Ali with the quote “Suffer now and live the rest of your life as a champion”. Wise words indeed.

Perfect Day

I’m on track to recover some of the joy of living I had as a younger man.

08/01/2021

A truly perfect day

I’d be proposing to

The love of my life

Under the Eiffel Tower

As it lights up at night

We’d walk around Paris in the rain

And drink all night

Falling ever deeper in love

But back on planet earth

Keeping within the realms of possibility

Today was pretty close to perfect

A solid days work

A coffee with a beautiful  stranger

Pizza and a parents approval

The gym and a quiet night

In the bliss of solitude

All this calm

This nourishing of the soul

Is as new as the dawn

As fragile as a snowflake

And as precious as a gem

Let this be

Just the beginning

Of recapturing

The love of life

I had as a youth

And the inner peace

That’s eluded me this past decade

Let love grow tall

In every direction

And maybe, just maybe

I’ll be a peace with the world

For years and years to come

—

If you were to ask me what would be a perfect day for me, you’d be asking two questions, a perfect day if anything was possible or a perfect day that could realistically actually happen.

As the poem says I had a wonderful day this week mostly because of a date with a stunning woman I met on tinder.

I recently showed a mate some photos from ten years ago and he was struck by the fact I actually looked happy. I feel like I’m on track to recover some of that joy of living I had when I was younger.

A Life Well Lived

Stalk the prey of contentment like a relentless wolf.

05/01/2021

Forget the past

Let the future be where

We focus the gaze

Of this consciousness caper

One thing at a time

One foot in front of the other

On this journey towards

The life less ordinary

And the bliss of achievement

Let the mistakes be forgotten

They can’t be changed

And plot a course towards

A better life

A better crowd

Than the assholes that abound

Let us race towards

The best version of our selves

And a life of passion

Worthwhile vocation

And relationships that bloom

Like the sweetest flowers

And it’s true

It takes time to build

But what else is there

Than to chase that light

With a hunger divine

Be patient young apprentice

Work hard and stress less

You just might find yourself

On the golden path

We once thought lost

Take pride that we’re arrived

In the land of paradise

That is a life well lived

—

What else is there but to stalk the prey of contentment like a relentless wolf? It takes time, patience and will power to get it within your sights but once there you should never let it go.

If I can find the joy of a life being well lived with all my baggage and trials than surely for an average joe it’s completely achievable.

Squeeze every drop out of this life, it’s the only one you’ve got.

Pride

This year I’ve improved more than most.

29/12/2020

The path of the righteous

Isn’t always easy

Everyday throws out

Challenges and ordeals

But we remain firm

Never admit defeat

Never give up

Never give in

To vice, to hate, to mediocrity

Watch me soar like an eagle

Over the rooftops and gardens

Of my city

The bush capital

My lover and destroyer

All at once

Take two of these poems

And call me in the morning

We’ll see who’s fairest, best and most improved

As we embrace the New Year on the horizon

The usual resolutions

Hit the gym more

Cook more

And finally get a girlfriend

Watch me glide back

To life at ground level

I’ve seen the lay of the land

I know where my demons hide

I know myself and know my pride

That keeps me clinging on

To the endless possibilities

Of life in the modern world

—

Life for anyone is far from perfect, mine perhaps further than most but we’re working on it and working hard.

While I’m still not far from the bottom of the food chain in terms of success, money and prestige I like to think I’ve improved more than most over the course of the year.

Merry Christmas

Fresh knowledge is a highly desirable commodity.

25/12/2020

Make love and war

Fight fire with water

And never ever forget

The way things could have been

Forget the regrets as we progress now

Forget the blood spilled

And time stolen

Because things could always be worse

Each new chapter

Better than the last

Work hard, live fast

Time heals all wounds

So let the past be the past

New friends and networks

The nourishment given

By fresh knowledge

Fresh synapses firing

Dopamine no longer a memory

Contentment no longer an impossible dream

So Merry Christmas and happy New Year

It gets better from here

And god bless us all

Pioneers of modern reality

Relentlessly unfolding around us

—

I seem to have recovered from the depression that was eating away at me. Yesterday was my first Christmas with family and presents and all the wonderful food in 7 years and it was everything I had hoped for.

I have a theory that fresh information, new people, places and circumstances helps your mental acuity so fresh knowledge is a highly desirable commodity.

Things continue to get better living free, let’s hope the trend continues.

Status Anxiety

I know that these feelings will pass.

12/12/2020

Falling fast and falling free

Too much reality is a terrible thing

They say run your own race

But it’s hard not to compare

Yourself to all the winners

That never faltered on the golden path

And no woman will ever compare

To the brightest star in my sky

Who left me cold

And I couldn’t blame her

With the baggage I carry

But all the hard work

And positive energy in the world

Can’t heal these wounds

And I’m the master

Of silver linings and glasses half full

But my relentless striving

Feels futile

In the face of status anxiety

And the endless sausage fest

Of life post release

So like Tom Waits

Wake up every day

Get behind the mule and plow

Sow seeds of beauty and light

Hit the gym

Work hard

Upgrade everything

Keep the vices in check

And hop like a bastard

That this feeling passes

—

Lately I’ve been having some uncharacteristic highs and lows, a few days ago at work I felt extremely depressed and later that day I felt just fine.

For the first 6 months of life post release I was comparing myself to crims and as such felt great about where I was positioned in life. Now after some time on the outside I’m starting to compare myself to regular folks and it’s kind of depressing.

I know that these feelings will pass but for now it burns my soul like a dog from hell.

Perfection

I endlessly wonder if everything happens for a reason.

3/12/2020


Highs and lows

Still no one knows

Just when it happens

That it’s your time to go

And me I’m nothing

If not a survivor

So I live without fear

Live like there’s no tomorrow

And learn like I’ll live forever

I always find

The silver lining

And the glass half full perspective

And while I’m not exactly where

I would’ve wanted

At age sixteen

But it could have been

A thousand times worse

Glass half full

The push and pull

Of freewill vs fate

There are programmes

In my head

That sent me to hell

And programmes

That got me through that hell

To a place that’s strange and significant

Let the summer sun

Burn away the filth

Let the ocean

Wash away the dirt

Of a decade of misfortune

And bad decisions

Make no mistake

Life is as beautiful

As it is ugly

And maybe we all fall

In between the good and the bad

And reach a certain kind of perfection

In our dying breath

Where all of a sudden

It all makes sense

And there’s nothing left

To meet the angels and embrace

The mystery of eternity

—

I borrowed the learn like you’ll live forever line from a good friend who says it often. I believe that we need novelty and new information to live well cognitively.

It’s a beautiful thing to evolve and change in the light of freedom and inner strength. Every day a decade of misery gives way to a future of hope and content.

I really like the idea of reaching perfection in our dying breath and I endlessly wonder if everything happens for a reason or if life is just chaos.

That Summer..

Bring on the summer.

1/12/2020

I have a feeling

That this summer

Will be special

Like the New Years of old

Looking for a countdown kiss

And I know

We’ll drink some

We always do

And the first Christmas at home

In six long years

Is a joy that few know

Bring on the beer bong

The goon of fortune

And the silver pillow

Let’s mess with our mates

When they pass out on the floor

With textas and tattoo guns

Let love blossom

Pairing up with the beautiful women

That we’ve always dreamed of

Dancing like kings

And trying new things

In the warm glow

That a house party brings

And this time I won’t

Take it for granted

For a good social scene

Is a marvelous thing

Corona all but conquered

In our part of the world

So no hesitation to see

Where the night leads us

We’ll improve our lives

And slowly claw our way back

To the best version of ourselves

As the summer heat

Incubates our luck

Running amok

In the city of my birth

We are the soul

Of this experimental city

—

It’s been a long time since a summer has held so much potential for me.

In Australia we have a game called ‘Goon of fortune’ where you clip a bag of cask wine to a Hills Hoist clothes line and spin it around like Wheel of Fortune and whoever it lands on drinks. I happen to have one in my backyard and friends coming around on the weekend so we may relive our youth and have a crack at it.

The city of Canberra is an experiment in many ways, special planning, architecture and features and I feel that the social scenes that rise and fall are the soul of this town.

Bring on the summer.

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